Ooo....watching the Westlife Special on MTV....yupz they're the artist of the month for Jan. Yeah... I was like, oi they're like outdated liao, why show them *again*?? Then i realised I really really missed them since their disappearance to make their album. Despite the single Hey Whatever, they're still the same old Westlife. A bit lah.
In UK they hosted an episode of TRL (total request live) and they were SOOO fun!!! The TRL in US is like, so damn boring compared to the one in UK. In UK they play insane games with the singers but in US they just ask stupid boring questions.... can see that the artists are also very bored. Man, the host of TRL in UK is so adorable (not looks). Yup. Westlife had to play race horse...so kawaii!!!! Some fan girls hopped onto their backs and the guys had to run a damn race..... so funny.... Bryan won, maybe cos he was the tallest. Longer legs. Not like Shane, who got 3rd...haha...
Hmm....so sad. Shane is married to this Gillian Walsh now. *sobs* He still looks so nice and innocent man!! Nicky is turning from sweet to sexy. He's so cool now...
Haha... you know, they're still the same. They don't have to get through to the USA to get famous. I love them when they're in the UK!! Okay, so they laughed at a poster of them which was taken like, a few years ago when the band was just formed. They looked so innocent and sweet and smiley in the poster, and the crowd didn't really like that. The US people want dao-ness, and sexy people, with a lot of girls around them -__-;; But Westlife doesn't fit that category. They look totally awkward with a lot of girls. That's why the video for Hey Whatever is the one I like the least.
And yup.... I fell for them all over again just recently. They're so fun to play around with.... (did I say that right??)... Just lock them in a hotel room with a sack of fan letters and they are reduced to ten year old kiddies, jumping on the beds and throwing rice balls at each other.... something like that. They've got this innocence around them which they try so vainly to dispell (to get the coolness they so desire) but they just can't, because it's their style. Either way, I'll still like them.
They've got this enthusiasm that other bands don't have. When in front of the camera, they're these excited little things, and they're madder when handed a video cam in their hotel room. I guess stardom and pressure to be cooler made them kinda awkward. It's so funny.
But I wwuuuuuvv them anywayz!! ^__^= kk...wanna go catch up with my 4 days loss of sleep now. Ja~
When there's no test coming up this week, the teachers load us with homework. Either way my life sucks. I'm so dead tired. Went to Popular to buy some nice paper for Valentine's Day.... I dunno why I'm doing this..... but the paper's really nice. Heh... don't be surprised to see that me and meeko have some same designs, cos we went to get them together.
I actually forgot what I wanted to say.... wadeva la...
I'm quite sick of it....ALL. If I was given a choice at all, I want to write every day.... 24-7. I want to write stuff every hour of my life, as long as it's something I like writing of and I have no interruptions or pissy people.... I want to write all day. Heck man... I don't even care if I have to quit school and not even get a job. I can just sit there, in a spot all day, just writing. I need to write. If not, I want to draw. I want to draw forever, till the day I DIE. I want to draw everything. And I want to be left ALONE when I do all that. My parents are irritating. It's not like THEY are taking the O Levels....
If I don't write anytime soon, I think I'll die. Just give me a pen and paper, or Microsoft Word, and I'll come up with something......... okay, so I already did. But I'm not showing it to anyone.... maybe ten years later when it gets published then you can go see it.
I'll just write later... parents in the room. Stupid.
*kisses the shores of Singapore* You.... don't know how GLAD I am to be back here, with the TV, the Internet, the radio, the anime, the music.... and my BED!!!!!!! My proper, nice, warm, cozy BED. With the air-con room and TV and snacks and Wahaha!!!!
You know, back at m'sia in the Kuching airport, the kitchen was freaking FLOODED, so no lunch on board... good thing, cos I HATE plane food. Makes me SICK to the bone. But we had a free lunch in Changi... not bad. I'm so tired I think I forgot what happened in Miri.... but who cares??!! Oh...it's 12.01am now. Still considered part of 24 Jan lah.... Yesh, and I don't EVER want to go back there again. Hmph. My parents have to drag me to the airport next year if they want me to come. They can even call the police or firemen to come drag me, but I'm NOT moving.
Hmm...the weather's depressing. In a beautiful sort of way. Raining all day. Back in Miri it did rain a bit, and I thought I was going to die of mosquitoe bites (therefore the drastic lack of blood) and left there to rot to hell.... I didn't even sleep on the last night. SERIOUS. I dunno... I figured it must have been the anticipation to go home to a better bed. Got about 2 hours of sleep and that's it. Hehe... didn't even bath on the last day because I couldn't wait to go home to hot, steaming water that comes from a pipe that's NOT rusty and leaking.
So... the people there are like, the SAME every year, so there's nothing much to say... only that the new baby is getting on my nerves. He's my cousin's baby. People treat him like a dog there. It's bloody crazy lor.... My dad is the worst of them all. -__- If my parents want an innocent, little baby that doesn't talk back, they can go make another one. Crazy people.... The adults went nuts over the kid, and I don't see anything special about him. First, they clap and snap their fingers at him.... I had to laugh at that. I mean, what do they expect him to do lor???!! Roll on the floor and PLAY DEAD??
Dumb kid. Dumber adults.
Got to meet some of my mum's former classmates and VERY close friends. They were like... so close even after so many years and called each other 'sister'...ya know, like 'da jie' and stuff. So close.... tthhhheeeeeenn.... they went on rambing and rambling about my height. So tall so tall so tall. One of the friends had this daughter. 20+ and quite tall also, and ttthhheeeeeeenn her mother go and compare our heights. Muaahahaaha.... I'm taller. Made her zip up about her daughter's height.
*huggles pillow*.... *hugs soft toys*.... I'm HOME. *sniff*....
Went to catch The Last Emperor just now. I was SO excited, cos I expected it to be like Forbidden City or something, but noooo. It was a ballet. *drops flat on the floor*............*somebody steps on me*..... so art-y. It's VERY Literature also. I thought it would be a musical, but it was SILENT all the way, except for the music and stuff of course. Dancing dancing twirling twirling twisting.... I went so dizzy lor.... I really liked the costumes and stuff, and the lighting was really awesome. They know when to fade the lights off at exactly the right time and make it look like you're watching TV or something....
...a tip: go read up on the Last Emperor of China before watching the show. You NEED to know SOMETHING at least. Otherwise, you'll be stumped there. We got the box seat, and my parents didn't like it cos we needed to turn our necks a bit. -___-;; Haha... it wasn't that bad. And yeah... it would be really cool if it were a musical though. Well... now that it ISN'T, feehh... just listen to the music, then the mood of the setting will come naturally. The dancing also means a lot (DDUUH!!) and sometimes, it ain't obvious what the script is trying to point out. You can get damn bored after watching those people dance here and there for minutes on end.... you'll be thinking, 'like, when the hell are they gonna stop??'. A single dance can last forever. But just go read up on the history of China before watching... it will help a great deal.
Oh man... I'm so tired. And YAY, I've got MY BED to sleep in!!!!!! HORAAHH!!!!!!!!
*slams down on the bed like a WWE wrestler*
Bloody SHIT lor. My parents finally got tickets to go to Malaysia TOMORROW. It was originally on Thurs, which is far better, so I can complete my hw on that friggin' day!!!!!!! AND I DON'T want to stay there, EVER. I'm so sick of the place. SICK.... why do I *always* have to go back to m'sia EVERY YEAR!!!!!????????? It sucks there.... no internet, got TV but no cable, and the channels are either ALL in Malay, or those with Malay subtitles. Bias asses. Don't even have chinese subs!!!! I'm gonna just SIT there all day and just DIE.
This is SO a good time to get retarded.
Dammit... the flight is like, at ONE something TOMORROW, and my parents like to be the earliest birds for EVERYTHING, which means I have to run run run back home right after school!!!!!! Sucks lor...
Meeko told me to go missing tomorrow morning, and stay hidden... cos my parents can only file a police report after 24 hrs... then we'll miss the flight.... hahaha.... then I'll be mince meat. My parents don't understand, man!!!!!!!! I HATE to go back there. I seriously HATE it. I think I'll just throw temper in m'sia and they'll be so sick of me they'll send me back to the lovely beautiful SINGAPORE!!!!!
FAT HOPE. Why the HELL must go there every year???!! Aiyo... just ask my parents to send those ppl there money to come to s'pore lah.... then i don't have to pack every single CD I've got lor.... I'll be listening to CDs ALL DAY. I can't bring the labtop cos THEY don't allow. SHHHITTTT!!!!! *punches the wall* Worst of all worst things is I've already got an appointment with meeko tomorrow..... go Bugis to find this shop that sells miniature skateboards and stuff.... but now it's SHATTERED.
I'd rather camp in school in the field then go back there to that Miri place.... NOW my mother is pissed at me, cos she knows I don't want to go back to her house in Miri. SO?????? Her house down there is not the most perfect place in the world!!!!! She can take my submissive dad with her and leave me in s'pore and I DON'T CARE AT ALL. I'd rather STAY HERE. I SWEAR, s'pore is a million times better than Miri. Trillion times....
Shit lor.... what to do NOW???!!!!!! Cannot do anything. I have no say when it comes to this kind of crap. This is one CNY I totally HATE. *BIG SIGH* Die..... great. Now I've gotta rush with hw tonight, and I CANNOT DO THHHHHHHAAATTT because gotta get up EXTRA early for tomorrow's concert... everything is NOT going with the flow. DIE. My parents better shut the hell up when I cannot finish hw in time on Sunday, and keep their nagging to THEMSELVES.
Watched the school of rock just now...opps, I mean eh... yesterday, yeah. Now's past midnight.
Oh holy crap, it RAWKED THE HOUSE!!!!!! The people in the cinema went nuts over the climax of the movie: the contest. Everyone was like, clapping and whistling! It was an awesome movie!!! If you haven't watched it yet, what the bloody hell were you doing???!!! MAN, I wished I had a teacher who would come to class and literally teach us to be a rock band, and when the principle or vice comes to check up on everything, we stash the goods somewhere else.
Haha....can dream on. It just rocked, man. Rocked the house down. Plus the students of rock were like, ten years old. They've got some talent, man! I'm like, SO inspired to learn the drums and electric guitar.... but if I want to practise those, it'll wake the crazy neighbours downstairs and we'll have lawyers' letters coming veerrrryyy often. But I really wanna.... that dude who played the drums (me thinks his name is Freddy or something), yeah... he's so punk and rebellious (for a ten year old at least) he was my favourite character right away. He reminds me of Malfoy from HP...blonde, rich, and rebellious. Very cool sort of character.
Oi, like... he's a ten year old... they're ALL ten. When I was ten, I knew shit about rock and heavy metal.
Of course, the movie's not only about rock and breaking all the rules in school, but it's like, telling people out there to pursue your dreams. Yeah.... it's VERY prominent in the movie. There's *always* this emphasis on living your dream and stuff. Haha.... being a Lit student is driving me nutterz....
Go catch it.... you'll NEVER regret stepping into that cinema EVER.
Failed the A Maths qualifying test. Like, what's new? I suck at almost everything I do, just because I don't put in my best. And when I DO put in my utter best, it isn't enough.
Problem now is, I've got two major fears: fear of failure. I can get a fever SO damn easily when I realise that I've failed a subject. The stupid thing is that I do *nothing* to help myself. The anticipation can make me faint in one second, I swear. I just don't show it outside. At least I try not to. The second thing is: fear for my future. Yeah, more emphasis on this one. Sure, *everyone* has some sort of fear for their futures, so if you don't, you're either damn confident about it or there's seriously something wrong with you.
My future is just a blank void. But something just tells me I'm able to draw some masterpiece on that blank void, and make it something of *worth*. So I'm not gonna just sit here and wait for that to come. I CAN'T. But one thing or another pulls me down so deep till I can't do much but wait for someone else to pull me back up again. And it's a good thing there's always someone there. I'm lucky to have such people. I won't mention any here though. No, not ALL are all that helpful.
*sigh*......my number one aim (at least for the time being): just study like hell. And if nothing works, I can just go write a book and publish it. Profit and recognisation (this one not very impt), and I get to do what I love best.
So now I'll just scram, because like, who gives a shit anyway?!
Okay, so the tension in the guzheng tuan has risen quite a bit since the election last year. Sure, not *everyone* can be absolutely happy about who becomes the VP or level head or anything else. But HELLO, majority wins. That's how it had ALWAYS been all over the world. That means majority of the people are happy about things, and if you aren't, just shut it, because no one would want to listen to your petty crap on the web.
I guess that person/group who posted that message seriously has a screw loose somewhere. Obviously, she/they didn't know how big a commotion it would bring. Guzheng tuan can never be the same, I guess.
If you're angry with something, you can just *voice* it out. Voice. Meaning the use of your mouth directly, goddit? NOT the damn world wide web where everyone on this friggin' earth can read it and go on rattling. Worst of all, rumuors/ messages/ secrets get passed around the school faster than wildfire here. In other words, half the school population could know about this at the end of this week. Wanna bet?
Well. I'm not ready for a bet. I'm not ready to deal my sanity on this bloody matter. Whoever you are, just freaking own up. Neither side will win anyway, because as Mrs ding said, there will NOT be another election just because some unhappy people decided to vent their unsatisfaction on the web. And the other side will not win either because some people have been seriously hurt by those words.
I dunno.... I can't say I hate that person/ group who posted that message. I don't even know you. People already have their suspicions on who you are. But anyway, I won't know you as well as they do. Like...er... I don't really hate Saddam for doing what he did. I never knew him. The same here. I don't know who did that, so I can't point anywhere I like. I have no right, really. You have your many reasons (which you so boldly posted for the whole world to see).
I'm just really disappointed. I can't say more, because I might be wrong at some point.
Well, whoever it was, you should be happy.... because once you get to see the principal, you'll get to voice your dissatisfaction ALL. YOU. WANT. You know what....? For the person who wrote that on the web, go scream at the wall, man... at least you won't be hurting anyone by doing that, plus you get to vent your anger all you want. And don't blame anyone if that wall comes crumbling down on you.
Ooohhh boy. I'm back home from the school's CCA fair. Man, I'm still sweating like a pig here.... Good thing my labtop worked. I charged it all night for this...
My right arm still aches from carrying the guzheng up all the way to the 4th floor. I'm in dreadful pain. But it was all worth it. Everyone had a lot of fun today. It seemed like the shortest CCA fair we ever had...maybe because the sec ones were so restless. Haha... their parents went different ways in the school, so it was easy to target them. One. By. One. Haha...
I caught one dad and forced him to take a pamphlet. Wrong move, man. Okay, it wasn't that bad. He just took it and told me that when his daughter was in sec one, she was 'rejected' by the guzheng tuan. Man.... so embarrassing. Well... not my problem, k!! Then I told him to try his luck this year. Oi, what am I supposed to say??!! So stunned down there, and I was like, grinning away 'like a perfect imbecile' (from 20th century Lit book, copyright).
Anyways, I had a lot of fun, despite my bloody running nose and sore throat and cough. Hmph... kept sniffing all the time during the CCA fair performance. I swear... I think my sweat is leaking everywhere.... hmm... weird picture.
The choir sang 'There can be Miracles'. Oh man.... reminded me of that one time we went to Kallang theatre for the SYF closing ceremony and there was this BOYS' choir that sang the same song. It was SO the best thing I've heard from a choir. Plus, they're GUYS. Still have soprano and all those musical terms.... cannot imagine a guy singing so high. But my school's choir did well too. Wow.... Eleanor was like, SO expressive. Can be compared to our guzheng lao shi. And can see Desiree from where I sat. Hm.... look so dead today, dunno why.
Some people coming over now (namely meeko, desiree, qiyin and karen). I *think* so. Wah... so tired still can walk over to my house??!! I already had my own problems reaching home. Tired. Tired. Tired.
But I think everyone did well. Now, it's time to see how many sec ones we can fish in.
Very tired now. Sleepy. As though I've not slept in a thousand years. Didn't blog for quite a while because there was a damn Chinese test today, and naturally I'd be studying like hell for it. That is SO not me, but this year is a damn important one. Can't afford to fall back one step. And since I'm dropping A Maths, I've got nothing much to fall back upon. So, I'll have to study till my brain bursts.
Great. Gotta bring the labtop tomorrow AGAIN. They didn't even use it today. I'm like, SO tempted to play games and watch anime on it during recess.... *sigh*
This Lee Hom CD not bad... ARGH... I'm falling into the Chinese music industry!!! Must listen to Westlife tonight again. Haha... And now, I've got a bloody sore throat, and my nose is running all over the place. Gonna go sleep early tonight. I mean, I think I've lost a lot of sleep when school reopened, so I'm gonna steal it back.
On another *note*, enjoy this template. Very nice jap anime template. Caught my eye because of the flute... Amoboshi (or was it Suboshi??) in Fushigii Yuugi plays the flute, and it can make anyone go nuts.... literally. Not because his playing is terrible... it's cos it has some kind of... of... *spell* on it, and whenever he plays it, people just drop in his command.
Speaking of music, the CCA fair is this Sat. I'm just in it for the other CCA's souveniers.
Yesh....I finished making that banner thingie for the board by 11:30pm last night. I was supposed to quit if I couldn't finish by 11 but drawing stuff, specifically water lilies and mei huas, makes you forget about anger. Uhn...yeah, cheesy. But drawing helps me release anger in a more.... sophisticated way. The only thing I'm happy about is that my peeps loved it, so it was well worth the sweat and blood and sore hand and backaches and sore neck ^__^.....
This morning lao shi was so.... damn him man... he was so freaking exaggerated with the sec 1 orientation speech!! He keep on telling vt to have 'more body language' and other lame stuff... he thinks it's so damn easy issit?? Wah... he's so 'smart' he can just go do it himself. Heh.... now I have to bring my labtop on Tues and Thurs. It better not get scratched. Today came home and found some of the guzheng tape sticky stuff on the MAGNESIUM cover. Argh. Took a long time to rub everything off because the spot was so big.
Gonna go play badminton later at like, 5pm. It's been a bloody long time since I've played. No exercise since the hols.... better start moving more. I'm so weak, I was like, sweating like crazy when I reached home, just because I had to carry the damn labtop. It was so friggin heavy because I brought all the wires and stuff. >__< Gotta go sleep now. Ja ne!
I'm going INSANE here.
First of ALLL, the first day of school didn't turn out VERY good, because of a stinking bloody ass decipline talk which lasted FOREVER~~ but NOOOOO that's not the worst part... the worst part is, the sec 1 orientation is coming, and the conductor + our very auntie teachers-in-charge expect everything to be NICE and PERFECT. FEHh!!! Let them all BURN IN THE DEEPEST PITS OF HELL!!!!!! And that ain't DONE YET -- ya know wat??!! I haven't even practised the new song we've got to play, and the conductor is like, expecting us to memorize it!!!! What the HELL!!!!
Look, pal, I didn't attend any shitty lesson last week, so I'm LOST, and yeah, my memory skills SUCK, so I'll be stuck trying to memorize the damn song ALL NIGHT. OOOoohhh, and YEAH, I've got to juggle THAT and making the BBBIIIGGG words 'GUZHENG TUAN' on the board (in BOTH eng and chinese, SHIT!!). Come ON lor! I did it already, and that one took SO MUCH BLOODY TIME and the one I'm supposed to make is 3 times BIGGER. How on this godforsaken earth am I gonna DO THAT!!!!!!?????????
If the ding ding and dwarfy nag even just ONCE tomorrow, I SWEAR I will use violence!!!!!!!!!!!! Bitches. And that lao shi can go rot and DIE!!!!!! Screw that ASSHOLE. I don't think I'll be able to finish all of that!! ARRARGGGGHHHHH!!!! I can just go and DIE. I mean, I just knew TODAY, k???!!! If someone told me earlier I think I would have done SOMETHING at least!!!!!!
Okay, FINE, I'll give myself a limit. If I can't finish everything by 11pm tonight, I'm QUITTING. Lao shi and his 'pretty' associates can just go jump off a cliff for all I care.... which I DON'T care AT ALL!!!! Go and fuck themselves UP MAN!!! ARRRGGHHHH!!!!!!!!! Just SHUT DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*constructs a voo doo doll of lao shi and shits on it before burning it*
Can you believe it? It's the first day of the new year. Stayed up till 2:30am because... I couldn't believe it myself. 2003 was spectacular. I spent that time from midnight to 2:30am just letting it all go. Some of 2003 still clings on stubbornly, but I ignore it. I hate most of the teachers we've got for 2004. I HATE them. Maybe except a few who have come a long way with us.
...My aunt from Canada is on the phone with my mum now. I spoke with both just now, and eh... it feels kinda cool because over there, they're celebrating New Year. Duh.... their time zone is like, a day difference or something.
And back to Singapore... I've got nothing much to say because I can't say I LIKE it that 2004 is here. Everyone else like those people partying at Sentosa this early morning don't have much to worry about... THEY don't have O Levels to worry about. THEY don't have one of those bloody teachers to worry about. And yet, there are some things that are worth it, like friends to depend on, and whom can depend on you. I dunno... things just happen too fast. In a heartbeat, D & D will be in your face. And before that of course, will be the damn exams.
Sometimes, I feel like...... what am I gonna do? If some good soul would offer an opportunity for me to quit school, I'll gladly take it. I know what I want to be. If crime inspecting doesn't work out, it will definitely be writing. Yeah. Definitely be writing. I haven't done a whole load of homework, so I'll be off to sulk now.
